"http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-transitional.dtd"> hole in the wall
Monday, June 04, 2007
Perfect World
Wouldn't we all want to live in one.

Here's the virtual one though, take a look:



Hope this gets me into cbt...

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Saturday, May 05, 2007
Blue 42
1. Your name plus "ness"?
bugokness

2. Two feelings at the moment?
sleepy, brooding

3. What are you listening to right now?
It's Gonna Rain theme song from Ruruoni Kenshin

4. Done anything you regret so far this week?
rejecting mom's offer to buy me an iPod

5. Describe where you are right now?
just woke up at guy friend's bedroom... ahahay

6. The highlight of your week?
being out!

7. What are you craving to have right now?
crispy pata

8. Who were the last people you ate with?
olgs, fei, sonny

9. What are you scared of?
arrest

10. Last movie you watched?
The Transporter

11. Last songs you sang out loud?
Bon Jovi's Wanted Dead or Alive

13. Are you thinking of someone right now?
no

14. Who is the last person you talked to?
same guys

15. Last thing you downloaded on your computer?
haven't been using mine for a long while now

16. Have you changed much this year?
not really

19. Hug or kiss?
kiss

no questions 20-22?
seems so

23. Who was the last person to text message you?


24. Where was the last place you went to besides where you are?
laundymat

26. Do you speak any other language other than English?
filipino

27. Last thing you watched on TV?
Ripley's

28. Do you dress for style or comfort?
comfort

29. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
St. Augustine. ain't it obvious

30. Ever had a drunken night in Mexico?
no

31. What's the craziest thing you've done?
don't know

32. Favorite color(s)?
purple, gray

33. What's your favorite cereal character?
koko

34. What is your favorite Michael Jackson song?
the album i got when i was 9.. I just now googled it to be Dangerous

35. Who do you love?
uyyyy pang slumbook

36. Any plans right now?
don't know

37. What are your plans for tonight?
none

38. What are you looking forward to tomorrow?
none

39. Last time you smiled?
last night

40. Who do you wanna be with right now?
prefer to be alone right now

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Friday, April 20, 2007
Hypno Crown
Finally that Sanjay dude is out of American Idol. Took more excruciating weeks than expected but still. He might have lasted so long because he's funny, funny like the butt of the joke funny, or because he is constantly coming up with new hairdos every week, but man, he's just not good. Utterly horrendous. I'm pretty sure the judges are now breathing relief that their incredibly tasteless decision to let him in the Top 24 is now moot.

I'm betting that it'll be Jordin Sparks and Melinda Doolittle in the Finale.

---

The guy behind the Oakwood takeover, Trillanes, was on the news today and I swear he was interviewed right where we were meeting our attorney during his visits at Crame last year. The reception area. I distinctly remember the wire fences boxing the small space, though I didn't see enough details to make me real sure.

Chills. In ten days it'll be our Apprehension Anniversary. Woot. I feel like Jasmine awaiting something impending and inevitable. At least she had that bald guy to tell her the exact time. With us, it's just a dull wait.

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Sunday, April 15, 2007
Line Blitz
di pa ko nakakapag ganito e mafirstime nga

1. kelan ang bday mo? yung totoo?
nov 13

2. may fave song ka ba ngayon?
The Prayer ng Bloc Party tsaka I Don't Love You ng My Chemical Romance

3. barat ka ba?
hinde basta meron pa

4. close ba kayo ng mga pinsan mo?
oo

5. ilang beses ka maligo sa isang araw?
isa

6. anong perfume/cologne/body mist ang ginagamit mo?
wala no need

7. sino-sino mga kasama mo sa bahay nyo?
tita, pinsan, inaanak, katulong

8. which do you prefer? Long or pudpod na nails?
pudpod. dati mahaba at painted black

9. mahilig ka bang maglinis ng tenga pagtapos maligo?
hinde

10. may sarili ka bang restroom?
wow naman

11. mahilig ka bang mag internet?
oo

12. anong favorite mong site?
ung me magagandang babae na konti saplot. gusto mo, madami ako alam, libre tol!

13. kung tatanungin ka kung anong silbi mo dito sa mundo, anong isasagot mo?
taena naman

14. anong favorite mong kulay?
gray, dark blue, furfle

15. anong kulay ang suot mo ngayon?
olive green

16. anong kulay ng bed sheet mo?
pink and blue stripes

17. kung merong kang 1 hundred thousand dollars ngayong oras na to anong gagawin mo?
susupalpalin ko ng pera ung putang babae na yon, kung aayawan nya ipambabayad ko sa hitman

18. kung may isa kang wish na gustong matupad as in ngayon na, ano yun?
ang mabalik na sa dati ang buhay namin

19. anong gusto mong gawin sa mga oras na to?
magswimming, magdota, kumain

20. sinong pinaka huling tao ang naiisip mo bago ka matulog?
di ko alam baka wala

21. anong iniisip mo pag gising mo sa umaga?
pesteng buhay to

22. sino sa mga friends mo yung alam mong pwede mong pagkatiwalaan?
ung mga nakakaalam ng problema namin, kaya nga iknwento ko e

24. sino naman sa kanila yung madalas mong makasama?
walaaaa T_T

25. cnong bestest best friendS mo?
aj, alan, aaron

28. sinong huli mong naka text?
pinsan ko

29. sino huli mong nakausap sa phone?
si mommy

30. na-inlove ka na ba?
ata

31. in love ba sya sayo?
lucky me

32. nagka-boyfriend/girlfriend ka na ba?
oo thankyoulord kala ko sawi ako habang buhay e

33. sino ang trip mong kasama sa mahabang biyahe at bakasyon?
lahat!

34. sino crush mo ngayon?
Wendy and Bea ng PBB, Lauren Cohan, Diane Krueger, Kim Chiu, Maja Salvador, Anne Curtis, Antonella Barba, Jessica Alba, Jennylyn Mercado, Isabel Oli, Evangeline Lilly, Zhang Ziyi, ung girl sa Full House, atbp

35. ano talent mo?
gaming, eating, drinking, sleeping

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Sin City Virtues
Sin City was a blast. The movie featured three stories taken right out of three graphic novels in Frank Miller's Sin City. The first follows Marv, an incredibly strong brute capable of doing and surviving anything he's driven to do, while he seeks justice for the death of the one woman who showed him unquestioning kindness. Next is A Dame to Kill For and The Big Fat Kill's Dwight, who struggles to keep the truce between the Old Town girls and the cops by all means necessary. And then it's Hartigan, an honest detective who got framed and accused at molesting an underage girl right on the day he was going to retire.

These pages are from the first book Violent Marv. The one above wasn't in the movie though.


I wondered why the movie was black and white. Like 50's movies, I thought. Or maybe because it's too violent and there'd be too much blood that being in full color would be too gory. Like the Crazy 88 slashing frenzy in Kill Bill. No, it's because the comics were in b&w. And it's this style that really sets Sin City apart. There is no hue in any page, it's either inked black or left white. And yet Sin City itself does not deal with absolutes, no purely benevolent heroes, no supremely evil enemies. Everything is gray. It adds all the depth that colors and shades could. It sets Sin City in a harsh, unforgiving light and gives you a sense of inevitable doom and despair. It brings out the darkness residing in each of its characters while letting their virtues shine amidst such a cruel world.

This is the style of drawing I've always wanted to be able to do, even back in high school. There are no lines, just fills.

The other part of Sin City's greatness is its first person narration. Each book is captioned with the thoughts and views of its protagonist, and it's what makes the storytelling tick. And it's not filled with the high and mighty talk of superheroes; these are the fears and hopes of ordinary people.


I read a bunch of 'regular' comics later, after I finished with Sin City and its other titles. And the DC and Marvel ones are just lame. I couldn't help comparing how shallow they are to Sin City. And how ridiculous! Like in Wolverine Origins, which I thought would be cool, Logan just looked silly in his mask and tights. And the story, no matter how many twists the writer put it through, remained plain. Sin City is so deeply immersed in conflict and emotion and issues that it totally demolished the already slight believability of superhero anthologies.

I erased the other comics I got, afterwards. They're so dull now. I still like the superhero mythology, which is what I really liked about comics in the first place. Which hero has what kind of power and what happened when he met this other character, etc. But the storytelling will never compare.

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Monday, April 09, 2007
Easter Sunday
Last night a cousin of mine came lugging three bottles of Red Horse Grande. "Gusto lang kita makainuman."

Not that I have anything else to do but I'm not one for heads-up beer sessions. Also we weren't close, like with other cousins. The most we see each other is about once a year, during our New Year gatherings. So I'm surprised.

Turns out he was tipsy already. He and my other cousin had a few beers earlier that evening. The latter had an early engagement the morning next so they had to pack up sooner than the former wanted; he was bitin. And the nearest he could one-on-one on was me.

"'San ang puti mo na ah! At pumayat ka na!"

Hehe. "Lul. O, balita?"

"Bukas malalaman na."

He was actually in a legal predicament not far from mine. Involving still a girl, but this time on a more intimate nature, iykwim. A kindred spirit. My slight unwelcome ebbed.

"Ah. Ano ba talaga nangyari tol? Di ko lam yung buong kwento e."

So he told me. He's like his father when he tells his story, waving his arms around and about, his hands forming very animated gestures. His father had a notorious penchance for getting piss-ass drunk. 'To Meo also liked gesturing.

When he finished I still didn't get why the girl pressed charges. I asked him to explain but his answers went off tangent more and more.

"Ay 'san me napanaginipan ako. Napanaginipan ko si Jesus."

Riiight. It is Easter Sunday. It must be the booze. He spoke deliberately, like old folks do when they had elderly wisdom to impart to young 'uns and had enough alcohol in them to believe that what they are saying is A Truth of The Universe.

"Nakita ko si Jesus nakaputi, mahaba balbas, tapos me baston. Tapos pare, tinalikuran ako. Nagpapakuha na ko e, nakita ko yung katawan ko tol, nakalutang ako nakatingin sa katawan ko, pero una yung baston nya tas sunod yung katawan tinalikod. Naglakad palayo."

I tried real hard not to laugh. The booze had already done its effect on me and I was beet red all over. He went on, all seriousness.

"Ibig sabihin me misyon pa ko tol. Ayaw pa ni Lord. Gusto ko na e, pero tumalikod sya. Nagising ako umiiyak. Alam to ng ate ko tsaka ni mama. Kulang lang tayo sa panalangin. Ako na nagsasabi sayo pre. Di dapat tayo nakakalimot sa Kanya."

He went on, and on. I didn't mind much, I was warm with beer and he brought lots of potato snacks. Halfway through our second grande he leaned his arms on the table and nestled his face on his arms.

"O inaantok ka na, dun ka na sa kwarto 'san."

"...Inde, kaya ko pa to. Pahinga lang ako," he mumbled.

He never raised his head. He sat there and passed away.

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Friday, April 06, 2007
Good Friday
What would it be like to have your death be the best thing you ever did in your life?

I was struck by the thought while reflecting on the carnage of 300. You see, it was the three hundred's death that fueled the raging hearts of those who later took arms and carried on their fight. Same with William Wallace. He died but his cause flared to life in each of his people. By themselves they probably could have led their sides to victory, but in dying, they made that probability into a certainty.

Yes, what made their deaths so inspiring and significant was, in fact, what they did while they were alive and what they stood for. But it was dying itself that gave the most impact.

Look at Ninoy. I think it's fair to say that if he wasn't assassinated, there would be no People Power 1. Imagine if he lived, and went on to battle Marcos through laws and politics, etc. Could he have been as successful? Could he have filled the masses with the necessary fervor to struggle against the dictatorial oppression? If he himself urged the people to rally in EDSA, how many would've come?

Rizal chose to die at the hands of the Spanish government. He was offered escape by Bonifacio while in Dapitan. Known then for his fierce patriotism through his writings, he was also asked to lead the revolt against the Spaniards. Yet he said no to both. He himself knew that the best contribution he could ever give to win their freedom was to pave the way with his blood. (see bottom for disclaimer)

Then there's also Jesus. His teachings and miracles that are told in every Bible will shape humanity's morality and goodwill forever. But even as God on Earth, it is his death as Man, to redeem our lecherous and sinful souls, that stands as the most important. (see bottom also for second disclaimer)

Others in history have done the same. But there are also countless forgotten ones who died to save a life. Heroic acts that, while they may not be recorded for future generations to know, will always live on in the hearts of those they saved.

I'm still stuck on how it would feel, to be a Leonidas or a Ninoy, after they died. Not being around to taste the sweetness of victory, but a grateful memory to those who are.

---

Disclaimer 1: Sir Joel's lessons come to mind. That Rizal was chosen by the Americans as our national hero to pacify us during their occupation instead of Bonifacio. A peaceful, anti-violence advocate versus an aggressive, guerilla-trained war leader. Maybe all that story about Rizal's sacrifice are just hodgepodge but we'll never know.

Disclaimer 2: Of course this assumes you are Catholic. Or Christian at least. (How does Jesus feel about all these stupid denominations and factions each advertising their own interpretation of His faith?)

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